3.13.2013

Wedding Wednesday: The Long Engagement

"WHAT, why? Why would you wait that long?" 

That's the number one response I get when I tell people when we will possibly get married. 

 An engagement is a promise, and thats exactly what Jeremy wanted when he proposed, a promise. A promise that one day we will get married and one day we will be husband and wife. But with that promise that I gave Jeremy, he also made a promise to me. That he could be the husband and other half he has always wanted to be. Support and love me not only emotionally, but financially. Right now in my life I am a serious financial burden, my medical bills are astronomical, my school debt is also racking up. As a future wife I can't imagine to burden Jeremy with all of that right away. I have a job and I love my job but with the medical bills and school debt, it doesn't cover much else. On top of it all, I want a wedding, a beautiful wedding. I want something that we can pay for and not burden my mother with. I cannot imagine making my mother write check after check for a wedding that I want and she can't afford. 
I love Jeremy with everything in me and I want nothing more than to say I do, right now! But in this moment, we can't afford a wedding, we can't afford for me to be off my step-dads insurance right now. 
We have decided that we won't set a date until its financially responsible. Until my end in school is closer and we can feel comfortable taking on everything together. (Including those medical bills) 

This decision used to make me so angry, I didn't want that, I wanted a wedding, yesterday. ha! But the more I thought about the more it made sense, I can't be 25 years old, married and asking my step-dad to pay for my insurance and medical bills. Once I am married, I am on my own, I can't ask mom and "dad" for anything. I am so grateful that they let me be on their insurance for now and until I can have these current medical bills settled, then thats the way it will stay. 
I want to be able to pay for my own wedding and really love every single detail of it because we paid for it, and it is ours!

So that's that. I don't care what anyone says, were gonna have one long ass engagement and I am totally ok with it!! (Long as in within the next year and a half, I can't wait forever!)


12 comments:

  1. Girl it's not anyone's business except your OWN when YOU get married! I hope it doesn't get you down when people ask about it! I hope things get better for you and you can have the perfect wedding when you're ready!! :)

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  2. Love this post! We waited two years for similar reasons. We wanted to do it our way, with our money and not burden anyone! Good for you for doing what you want, how you want!

    Cynthia

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  3. I think this decision makes you wise beyond your years. Screw everyone else. At least you have the rock and the guy and can focus on getting your future set.

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  4. You probably know that other people's opinions shouldn't matter and this post probably shouldn't even been written since you don't have to justify a long engagement to anyone. BUT I know where you're coming from and I hope you get the wedding you've always wanted! I'm sure you and your fiance are both ready to make the leap right now but I admire your maturity and responsibility in waiting until things are financially stable! We (your readers) will remember to practice patience but we'll be super excited when those wedding posts come up!

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  5. Good for you!!! I am getting married in October and it is stressful and expensive and it is great for you to wait until you can plan the wedding of your dreams!

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  6. Oh my goodness I needed this! It seems like EVERYONE is getting married right now and I SO want to have the big party and the pretty ring and everything. BUT We made the decision to pay off our cars and loans beforehand, so we can really get started on a debt free, happy life. It's hard, but it makes it a lot easier to be frugal! Every time I want to spend money on something stupid, I remind myself that the sooner my debt is paid, the sooner BF is Husband! You two are smart to wait, and it just shows how great of a couple you are :)

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  7. I think this post proves how incredibly mature and realistic you are. I hate when people don't think about everything that comes with actually being married and sharing a life together. You two will be all the stronger for waiting.

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  8. I got a lot of crap about our long engagement too and I got sad when people asked me because the true reason was financially we couldn't do it last year. We've had 2 years to save and that was right for us.

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  9. Moral of my story - you guys are doing what's right for you. Very smart!!

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  10. I feel for you! We had the same question asked to us for years. We got engaged Christmas Eve of 2008 and are just now getting married May 2013. We did what was right for us. For both of us to be done with school and not relying on our parents. Did we want to wait this long, no. But is it worth it, yes! We are not as stressed and our wedding is all paid for. Enjoy this time!

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